My baby

With everything else going on, we've also been in the process of moving kids around. Lilah has moved in with the twins and is now sleeping in a big girl bed, and Finn is moving from our room into his own room. Ahhh . . . it's bittersweet. This milestone has made me sad with each of my babies. I've stretched it out with Finn as long as possible, but he's 9 months old now and really too big for the bassinet. Maybe he'll sleep better in a crib, in his own room. I put him down in the crib for a nap this afternoon for the first time ever . . . and he went down without a peep and slept for a good long while (and this was not drug-induced, as it had been several hours since I had given him any Tylenol/Codeine, although I think he is still feeling the effects of the anesthesia from yesterday). He has napped in his swing every day of his life! But he napped in his crib today for the first time and with no fuss.

So as I sat with him tonight in his room, rocking him to sleep, with soft lullabye music playing, the room dark except for a nightlight, I could hear the chatter of the other kids in other parts of the house, but I felt like Finn and I were in our own insulated little cocoon. And I felt so connected to and protective of him, it was almost painful. It was one of those moments I wish I could just hang onto forever, knowing how fleeting it all is, his babyhood, and the special tie he and I have to one another during this time in his life.

Again, he went down in his crib with no fuss, just like he did for his nap this afternoon. I am thankful (although realistically, I'm not expecting any miracles here; I don't expect that he'll sleep there all night, and certainly not through the night), but also a bit sad. I'll miss having him share our room. It's another letting go.