Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Open Letter to "Ricki"

I have a few things to say and then I'm going to put this to rest.

First of all, I've been asking myself ever since I read your "comment" why something from a complete stranger has bothered me so much. It shouldn't. I don't know you, and you don't know me. Period.

I won't even bother speculating about whether you have even the slightest thing in common with me. I doubt you do, so for you to presume to know how I should feel and how I should deal with those feelings is ridiculous.

Without debating the merits of the things you said (because what's the point? Anyway, I don't have all day to sit down and type the pages and pages I'm sure I could write in response to your very misguided "observations."), let me be clear on this: this is MY blog. You can compare it to a diary. It's where I go to express my feelings and try to work through them - the good, the bad, and the ugly. While I understand that I've chosen to make it a public diary (for a number of reasons, one of them being to hopefully shed some light on what can be a frightening path for the newly initiated), there are still rules of common courtesy that most people seem to instinctively be aware of: mainly, that if you want to leave comments of support, that's great. This is NOT a place to come to try and promote YOUR agenda. This is NOT an online forum or discussion board where topics are up for discussion or debate. You will NOT "save" me by attempting to shove your beliefs down my throat (and this tact, in fact, does not further your apparent cause - it hurts it).

I don't expect everyone to agree with everything I say and feel in this blog. But I'm not maintaining this blog to win any popularity contests. This is just one of the ways I have chosen to help me find my way along this journey of having a newly diagnosed child with Down syndrome . . . and if it helps a few other people along the way, it's an honor to be a part of that.

Please go find an appropriate place to try to further your cause. Your comments aren't welcome here.

9 comments:

Alycia said...

Ricki,

Your letter is absolutely ridiculous and disgusting. People like you disgust me. Don't use Christianity to sin. Well you "claim" to know the Lord your actions and choice of words show anything but that. I myself will pray for you. Maybe you should spend more time in His word and less time sending hurtful and downright mean e-mails to people you obviously know nothing about. You should work on being a much better witness and all around person.

“The best way to teach others about Christ and to make them desire to have Jesus in their own lives is to live a consistent, loving, Christ-centered life in front of them. If you are a good friend, a good listener, attentive to the needs of those around you and morally upright, then people will be likely to listen to you when you tell them about Christ because they will see that there is something genuinely different about you.”

"For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:2-5

Lisa,

I sincerely apologize for her actions. I know that people like that are the very reason that non-believers turn away from the Lord. Please know that although Ricki may believe in God she does not obviously follow his word. I really do apologize for her.

I love you. So much.

Kristin said...

I can't believe that someone would actually have the nerve to type that to you. I appreciate that you have kept this blog a public one so that we can all share your journey with you. You have every right to type your thoughts and feelings. I hope that this person will not cause you to loose a wink of sleep. I do not pretend to understand what you are going through but I know that with every life change that I have ever been through has caused me to experience many different and changing emotions and allowed me the perspective to make better decisions. The insensitivity of others blows me away. Sorry and hugs. PS- I see nothing but beauty in your face in those pics. The person but be both insensitive and BLIND!

Carla said...

Go Lisa!!!

Sophia said...

I just recently found your blog and I thank you for it. I think you're very brave to share your feelings so openly. I don't have any kids, but I feel like if I did have a kid with DS my reaction would be similar to yours and I find it just very comforting to know that you're struggling with the same kinds of things I would struggle with and surviving. In the abstract it seems like having a child who is different would be impossible to deal with, and yet you manage and the days pass and you find new ways to live that reflect your new reality and everyone is ok--some days better than ok--just like the rest of us. I admire your strength and your family. oh and also, your baby boy Finn is incredibly cute.

Laurie said...

Oh my gosh. Im so sorry that on top of everything else going on right now, you have to deal with this bs.
I am SO angry for you, Lisa. I dont even know what to say...please know that you are doing an amazing job. Try not to let this get to you. Adjusting to this new life sure as heck isn't easy. We need support right now and THAT IS IT!
Love you,
Laurie

rickismom said...

(By the way, I am "rickismom", not "ricki"--no connection)

Ricki should hear that the worst way to promote religion is to try and force it on others.
People learn by EXAMPLE, not words.

ahanson2001 said...

This kind of thing is why I have gone away from "religion". It really makes me sick. Ricki, you have no clue....I agree with Alycia.

(((HUGS))) Lisa!!

Cleo said...

Lisa, I want to take this opportunity to thank you once again for sharing your journey with Finn in such an honest and open way. I think you are a very authentic person, it takes a lot of courage to open your heart and express your thoughts and emotions as they come up, I highly admire you and respect you for that. I also think you are an amazing mother and a beautiful human being, I can see your family’s beauty in all your pictures.

Cindy said...

Anyone who says things in the name of Christ better check what they are saying before spewing. Especially when it comes to sensitive subjects. Lisa - good for you! In standing up to people who really have no clue on coping with life... Holy crap, I can't believe someone would come in the name of the Lord and pull a holier than thou attitude. Some people just make me sick and are the reason that we have walked away from religion as well.

Good for you Lisa!!! People like that leave bad tastes in my mouth.

BTW - did you know you can set the settings on this so that you can approve of the comments before they are posted? That way you can weed out that type of crap.